What happens when the person everyone looks to for strength is struggling too? Sarah sits down with US Army veteran, author and podcast host Richard Kaufman, known as The Comeback Coach, to explore addiction, recovery, homelessness, military service, suicide attempts and rebuilding a life with purpose. Through Richard's experiences, they discuss resilience, asking for help, supporting loved ones and why a difficult past doesn't have to define your future.
1. Your past doesn't have to define you
After addiction led to his discharge from the Army, Richard found his way back into military service. He reflects on the experiences that shaped him and his belief that meaningful change can begin with a decision.
2. Recovery takes awareness and ongoing commitment
Approaching 37 years in recovery, Richard discusses recognising triggers, maintaining boundaries and why addiction isn't simply something a person can switch off.
3. Even the strong ones need support
Richard openly discusses his two suicide attempts, ongoing mental health challenges and the importance of telling his wife when he's struggling. Being resilient doesn't mean never needing help.
4. Look after the people closest to you
Richard recalls realising he was so focused on helping others that he'd overlooked his wife's needs. Sarah and Richard explore listening, empathy, relationships and the importance of supporting those at home.
5. Everyone has a comeback story
Whether you're facing addiction, loss, mental health challenges or uncertainty, Richard believes the next step matters. His message is to keep reaching out, keep learning and remember that your story isn't finished.
“The three greatest words in the English language are today I decide.” — Richard Kaufman
“Sometimes when you're the strong one, you get tired of taking the arrows for everybody.” — Richard Kaufman
“Let's be okay not okay together.” — Richard Kaufman
Richard Kaufman is a US Army veteran, author, host of the Vertical Momentum Podcast and The Comeback Coach. He shares his experiences of addiction, recovery and mental health to encourage others to seek support and find purpose.
Connect with Richard:
Voice To Influence™:
Sarah Jordan-Ross (00:00) Hey everybody, welcome back to Taboo Talk with Sarah, the podcast that breaks the silence, fosters hope, and talks about the tough stuff so you never feel alone. If you're new here, I'm your host, Sarah Jordan Ross. I'm a wellness coach, a speaker, and I believe our stories have the power to connect us in ways we often don't expect. Today's guest is Richard Kaufman. He's a US Army vet, an author, podcast host, and he's known as the Comeback Coach.
Now Richard's story includes addiction, recovery, homelessness.
And an extraordinary military journey that saw him discharge for the army only to find his way back in and go on to serve for many more years. But Richard's much more than the difficult things he's lived through, as are all of us. He's taken those experiences and used them to help other people find hope, purpose, and courage to keep going. And Richard actually came onto my radar via our mutual friend Jim.
who recommended him after I put out a call saying, I need interesting, amazing people to talk to.
And then I had the opportunity of watching Richard speak at the Voice to Influence Summit and I knew exactly why Jim had said we should have this conversation. So I am really excited to see what today's conversation will bring.
So, Richard, welcome. I am so glad to have you here.
Richard (01:36)
Thank you so much and gotta give a big shout out to Mr. Jeff and also to Mr. Jim. I love you guys so much. Thank you so much for everything you do for our community.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (01:46)
Yes, they are among my favourite people.
Richard (01:50)
Yep. And I I love the voice, the influence. I had a great time talking about talking about resilience. And now we get to hang out. So I'm a happy man.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (01:59)
That's a good thing. Yes, voice to influence is a great spot to hang out. So I will put the details for VTI in in the show notes. So that if anybody's interested in checking that out more, they can. But for now, Richard, I've been opening every episode this season with the same question. And I'm always fascinated by how very different the answers are. So
What have you seen that you can't unsee and what does it make you want to do about it?
Richard (02:37)
Probably the answer for me would be the man in the mirror, the man that I look at every morning, and I can't unsee the person that he's become from the person that he used to be. And the good thing is that it's just the beginning. So I'm I'm I'm st I'm still growing. I want to get better one percent each day. So I'm excited for the future.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (03:06)
And it's so good that you see who you are now and can thank who you were for where you've gotten to as well, but know that who you were doesn't have to define who you are.
Richard (03:22)
Yeah, but you know, I also think that where I come from, I wouldn't be where I am if it wasn't for my past. So, like my my mentor, Mr. Ed Milet said, nothing bad has ever happened to you. It's all happened for you, and everything is a teachable moment. So it's supposed to happen. It
Sarah Jordan-Ross (03:44)
Love that.
Richard (03:45)
was meant to happen. So I'm I'm not a victim, I'm a victor.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (03:51)
And that's the thing, we can grow from every experience. It just depends on how we look at it.
Richard (03:57)
Yeah, you can either have post traumatic disorder or post traumatic growth. It depends on whichever way we look at it.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (04:08)
Now, I know we're going to be talking about resilience a bit, but on something I saw, you talked about having been discharged from the army and then finding your way back in and serving for a number of years. And every veteran I ever speak to, there's a lot in their stories to unpack. So I'm wondering.
What happened between the man who was discharged and the one who found his way back in, but then also from that man to who you are today?
Richard (04:49)
Well, I got thrown out of the military for being a drug addict and an alcoholic. and I got arrested for robbing a police officer. if you're watching this, don't ever rob a police officer. Just just just learn from learn from my experience. and he gave me a break. He told me I had to give the money back to him, and then I had to go to three hundred
AA meetings in a row, which I did. But as my uncle was bailing me out, he said, Richard, I knew you were ne you were never soldier material. He's like he said, I knew you would never make a good soldier. And coming from him, he was a Korean War veteran. He was a boxing champion of the Korean War. He meant a lot to me. And that really bugged me.
that ate at me. I couldn't sleep. I couldn't sleep for weeks, days, weeks on end. And I had to get back in the military. I had to show him I had to show him, okay, I I I am good enough to be in the military. So eventually I I did get back in the military. I had to join the National Guard to get back in. But eventually I I did get back in the military.
But I got still got into trouble when I was in the military. So I was about to be thrown out again for the second time. But nine eleven really changed my life and turned me around. And the man that was the man that was me on nine eleven, on nine twelve I was a totally different man. So and I believe that.
You can change in a second. It doesn't take hours, it doesn't take weeks, it doesn't take months or years. You can change in a in a in a second if things are that important to you. So I was no longer that same guy on nine twelve nine eleven that I became on nine twelve.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (07:03)
And I don't think you can see something like that, go through something like that without it changing you.
Richard (07:11)
Yeah, I mean an anybody can change. I mean, if somebody said to you you have terminal cancer.
You just changed. Something changed in you as soon as you heard those words. So anybody can change. You just have to be willing to make that change. And for me, the the the the three greatest words in the English language are today I decide. I decide if I if I want to be a victim or a victor. So anybody that's watching, you guys make the decision of what your life wants to be. Don't let anybody else make the decision of who you are.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (07:50)
That's it and make the decision.
Richard (07:54)
It's it's all about the we're all about our decisions. We're gonna five years from now, we're gonna be where our decisions led us. So if you're doing the wrong thing, five years from now, you're gonna be in a bad place. If you're doing if you're doing the next right thing, five years from now, you're gonna be in a great place.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (08:14)
And all we can really control is right this minute and what we do with that. And
Richard (08:22)
Yeah.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (08:22)
every decision we've made has led us to where we are.
Richard (08:27)
And also it it's you know, focusing. You know, focus foll follow one course until successful. You know, if you're I'm thinking about just being on this show right now. I'm not thinking about what I have to do tomorrow, what I gotta do later. It just focus on on the moment. Cause yesterday is gone. Today's not here. I mean tomorrow's not here. All we have is right now. So if you focus on right now and being present.
Then you will be successful.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (08:58)
I suppose that's why it's called the present. Each day is a gift.
Richard (09:03)
Yeah. We just have to unwrap it.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (09:13)
So many different questions to ask. I've got one for you though, with those
Richard (09:18)
Okay.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (09:18)
making decisions.
You mentioned that you struggled with addiction and alcoholism. What's one thing that you wish people understood about that and about the person that's struggling with it? What apart from making the decision to change, what is it that genuinely helps somebody begin to find their way out of that kind of struggle?
Richard (09:45)
Once they realize that it's a physical condition. It's an allergy. You're like when when I go out to to dinner with my wife and my kids, and somebody asks me, Do I want a drink? And I tell listen, I'm allergic to alcohol. I break out in handcuffs. And they laugh and everything. And they laugh and everything, but I I realize that it's a physical condition, just like
diabetes, cancer. It's a physical condition. So once you realize that it's it's that it's a physical condition, then you realize, okay, then it's treatable.
And it's not just something you can turn on or turn off. It takes a while to get healthy again. So, you know, if you're struggling, it's okay to struggle. It's o it's okay to, you know, it it's not easy to quit because everywhere you go, there's either food or alcohol. Almost everywhere you go, for every party, every Christmas, every birthday, there's usually alcohol all around you. So you have you just have to make that decision that
You don't drink. Like when somebody asks you want to drink, I tell I don't drink. That's it. I I a period. There's a period at the end of the sentence. And I've been clean going on thirty seven years.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (11:09)
Well done.
Richard (11:10)
But you know, I I have to be very, very careful. Like we were at the casino this weekend, we went to Landy City. Even if I order a Diet Pepsi and it comes in a in a cup, my wife still has to taste it.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (11:27)
Just to make sure.
Richard (11:27)
I can't yep,
I can't use regular mouthwash. my wife can't bake cookies with almond extract because it contains alcohol.
So I gotta watch out what what salad dressing I use. So
Sarah Jordan-Ross (11:42)
And if you ever
have Christmas at my house, watch out for the trifles.
Richard (11:45)
Th there you go. So, you know, i it just it just being cognizant, realizing you have an allergy. It just like has somebody have a peanut allergy or a tree nut allergy, it's the same thing.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (12:00)
Yes, and very much the same with with allergies. It's not a I'm allergic to chili. And lots of places it'll be the it's not very hot. It's like that's not the question. I asked if there was any in it because even a little bit can cause me trouble. Yeah, so it's the and so much in in our society is the one little drink won't hurt or it's like, no, you need to remember that
Richard (12:28)
And that well when s well when
when somebody asks me says that to me and I'm like, Do you have money to bail me out? 'Cause if I drink, I'm going to jail tonight. So make sure you have enough bail money to bail me out.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (12:41)
Yeah. And you make fun of it, but it's a very real possibility.
Richard (12:46)
Yep. And and you know, I and I always say I don't want to go back to day one. After thirty seven years, I don't want to go back to day one again.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (12:56)
You know that running into that particular brick wall hurts, so why would you do it to yourself?
Richard (13:02)
And but l you know, a lot of people, no matter if it's addiction, whether it's relationships, they like running into that brick wall. And then and then they get mad 'cause they ran into brick wall.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (13:13)
Like, it's not like you didn't know it was it.
Richard (13:15)
Yep. So it it it just it takes a lot of self reflection to to realize, okay, I have a problem, these are my triggers, I gotta make sure I I I know my triggers ahead of time.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (13:31)
And that brings us rather nicely to talking about your work as the comeback coach. So you know all of those things for yourself and now you help other people to recognise those and to get back up when life has knocked them down.
And that resilience is a huge part of of who you are. And I wonder if that's a side of identity that we don't often talk about. Like when you're the person that everyone looks to for encouragement and resilience, what happens when you're the one who needs help?
Richard (14:12)
Well, I mean, I've had two suicide attempts.
I still struggle with mental health issues. I I I tell every I still have post-traumatic str stress. I I have a traumatic brain injury. I'm I'm blind, legally blind. So I mean I still deal with this stuff. But
I have to know when like I know that how you and you and Jeff are and Jim and Jim and his bride are. you have to let your spouse or your significant other know when you're struggling. You know, w when I'm having a bad day, I'm like, listen, honey, having a bad day. I I just want I just want you to hold me. You don't even have to say anything to me.
Just haul me a little while until the demons go away. Cause sometimes when you're the strong one, you get tired of taking the arrows for everybody. And you know, event and that's why I believe and I always say one of my favorite quotes is you can't pour from an empty cup. You gotta make sure that your cup is full before you can pour into somebody else. So you gotta take care of your own especially if you're a coach, you gotta take care of your own mental health.
And you gotta have a coach. If you're a coach that doesn't have a coach, then if you're coaching yourself, then you then you have then you have an e an idiot for somebody that's one of your clients.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (15:54)
Yeah, they usually say that about lawyers, but I think it works the same for us as well.
Richard (15:59)
Yeah.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (16:00)
Yeah.
The lawyer who defends himself has a fool for a client?
Richard (16:04)
Exactly. Yep. So same thing with coaches. If if you don't have even even the greatest ac athletes in the world, they they love to be coached. And even the best coaches in the world love to be coached. So make sure you if you're a coach, you need to have a coach. Because they can see your blind spots.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (16:25)
That's the thing, it's always easier for somebody else to see those gaps that you don't see or to see it's always easier to solve somebody else's problems because you have that little bit of distance from it and you can see a bit more clearly.
have all the answers and none of us are perfect, so we need to all lean on each other.
Richard (16:52)
I think as as you get older, I think you have more questions than you do answers.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (16:59)
I would agree with that. I spent a long time in. I was a remedial massage therapist for 25 years and studied the body quite extensively. And I would frequently say, the more I learn about the body, and these days too, the the mind and emotions, the more I learn, the more I realise I know nothing. Which
Richard (17:22)
Yeah.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (17:23)
is a bit scary because I actually know quite a bit, but
Richard (17:27)
is and as long as you're teachable and you're humble, you know, life is really good when you when you become humble and teachable. 'Cause you never know you can learn from everybody. You can learn something from everybody.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (17:40)
Yeah. I sometimes think our children are our best teachers as well, 'cause they show us another way to look at things.
Richard (17:46)
Especially when it comes to tech.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (17:49)
Yeah.
Yes. Whatever would we do if technology was giving us a problem and we didn't have a fourteen year old to go, oit, fix it.
Richard (18:00)
Exact.
Yep.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (18:04)
Now my ten year old knows more about some things than I do.
Richard (18:08)
Yep, well my fourteen year old has a YouTube channel. She knows how to copy and paste and she knows how to make videos and and use cut Opus clip and and I'm like, You know how to do what? I'm like, wasn't I just changing your diaper a couple years ago? Now you're teaching me?
Sarah Jordan-Ross (18:29)
It is a fun thing to do.
Yeah, my fourteen year old actually edits the podcast.
Richard (18:36)
There you go, see? T ch train him young up the in the right way.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (18:41)
Yeah. And our younger one does like edits clips and and things and like puts promos out and 'cause he's very artistic and likes to experiment with like cap cut and all those and so Yep, you can do that 'cause something he can do in five minutes would take me five hours, so I'm much rather let him do it.
Richard (19:06)
Exactly.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (19:19)
When you say that you're the comeback coach, what does comeback actually mean to you?
Richard (19:28)
well that name was actually given me to me by a gentleman named Mr. Gary Vaynerchuk. Gary V actually gave me that name. he's the one that told me to write a book. He's the one that told me to start a podcast. So it's all it's all it's all because of Gary V. the comeback is just I'm writing a third book right now. It's called Too Dumb to Quit. And and I and I think it's kind of like the old Rocky axiom axiom.
You know, if you get if you get knocked down seven times, you get back up. You just keep getting back up. No matter you know, no matter what you're going through in life. As long as you don't quit, you can't lose. So I think the comeback is somebody that went somewhere, got lost, and now they're coming back to square one, starting all over again. And I and I think everybody has a comeback story in them. You know, everybody's
No matter if you're the CEO, whether you're the janitor, we're all dealing with the same stuff. So I I think everybody has a comeback story in us 'cause we're all struggling with something, whether we want to admit it or we don't want to admit it. We're all struggling struggling with with something.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (20:47)
Yes. And it it might be different things that knock us down, but as long as we get back up one more time then we get knocked down.
Richard (20:57)
Yeah. You know, like even Ed Milette wrote in his book The Power of One, you know, just one more. Just do just get just show up one more day. Just record one more podcast. Talk to one more person.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (21:13)
One more conversation.
Richard (21:15)
Have one more conversation. Make one more phone call. That's all you gotta do is one more. You don't have to do thirty more. You just gotta do one. And as long as you keep doing one more and you're not quitting.
You can't lose.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (21:30)
It might take you a while to get to where you want to be and you might take the scenic route to get there, but you'll get there.
Richard (21:37)
Yep, and you might not get where you're going because God might have other plans and He might set you on a a course to where you're really meant to be. And I believe that you know God sometimes He answers prayers and answers no. Maybe this is not good for you. Maybe this is not meant for you. Maybe not yet. So sometimes you know people say, Well
I haven't hit my goal yet. Well, maybe it's just not yet. It's not your time yet. Because sometimes I think, and and and and me and me and Jeff have talked offline. We sometimes God will anoint, and then He will appoint. So maybe you're anointed, you just haven't been appointed yet. So just stay, you know, stay firm.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (22:30)
Yeah, just keep making that next step, that next and trust that there is a plan.
Richard (22:36)
Yeah. There's always a plan. It just but I think sometimes when I love that somebody said it that when we make God we make plans, God laughs. Yeah. So I I
Sarah Jordan-Ross (22:51)
Yeah, 'cause he
knows what's coming down the track. That we can't necessarily
Richard (22:53)
Yeah. And yeah, and
Sarah Jordan-Ross (22:56)
see it.
Richard (22:57)
And sometimes he knows that we're not supposed to be in certain rooms because he know what he knows what was said behind our backs. You know, he knows
Sarah Jordan-Ross (23:06)
Yeah, that is true.
Richard (23:08)
that, okay, maybe I'm not going to open this door because there's something behind this door that you don't need to see. So I think if you just pray and have and plan your purpose, I think I think you'll do well as long as you follow his purpose for you.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (23:30)
And his purpose may not always be obvious from the start. Sometimes it's only when we we look back that we go, that's why that had to happen or that's what that was about.
Richard (23:44)
Yeah, and sometimes like I believe that if I didn't go through what I went through, now what I did go through, a lot of it was self-sabotage. so I take I take full responsibility. But I think that even I have some people in my family, when I was going through my stuff, they weren't exactly on Team Richard. But when other people in my family started dealing with addiction,
I was the first one to get called. So guys, if you know somebody that's struggling with addiction, don't make fun of them. They might just save your kid's life down the road.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (24:28)
Yeah. And that's it. We never know what somebody else is going through. And I paraphrase a Bible quote too on on that one. People in glass houses should not go throwing stones.
Richard (24:44)
Yeah. And some s but you know, some people I think
We don't realize how other people are struggling with things, you know, or or what somebody else is struggling with. Somebody might be struggling with somebody that's listening right now. This might be their last shot where they're like, you know what? I'm tired. And I needed to hear something positive. And this and this it interview or talk, this might get somebody to say, Hey, I need help.
And it's okay to get help. You know what I mean? So you never know who you're gonna touch or who's struggling. It might even be your your your spouse or your kids might be struggling. You don't even know it.
So try to make sure that you have a spirit of up that you're listening and ha and have empathy.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (25:43)
And a lot of ways that's part of why I started the podcast was I'd been hearing similar stories of of struggle. And then I was driving home from somewhere and a song came on the radio that I hadn't heard in years called Whiskey Lullaby, which is actually about suicide. But the thing was this one line, nobody
Richard (26:04)
Yep. I love that song. I love
Sarah Jordan-Ross (26:07)
ever knew. And it's yeah, they didn't know because they didn't talk about it.
We can't know when somebody's struggling if we don't talk about it. And you never know. The person sitting next to you, they won't be going through the same struggle as you because they're not you, but they're going through their own struggle. And perhaps listening to each other, you can help each other get through it.
Richard (26:36)
Yeah, and sometimes it it might be your spouse. Like when I first started this whole coaching thing, one night one night I came home and my wife was crying at the kitchen table and I'm like, What's wrong? And she says, Well, you're always helping everybody else, but you're not even helping the person that's sitting across the kitchen table. And that's when I realized you have to start helping from the f your family out instead of outside in.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (27:06)
'Cause quite possibly until that moment you didn't even realise she was struggling.
Richard (27:09)
I didn't. Yep.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (27:12)
And I read a quote years and years ago that this guy was saying to his wife that they said that shoemakers' wives go barefoot and doctors' wives die young. And he said, That is not gonna be true in this house. He was a doctor.
Richard (27:31)
And I think
Sarah Jordan-Ross (27:31)
And that's that's the thing we don't always see.
Richard (27:34)
Yeah, and I think we need to know we need to know our spouse's love language. Like I love the book, The Five Love Languages. That's that's one of my favorite books. But you need to know
Sarah Jordan-Ross (27:46)
It's a great book.
Richard (27:47)
what like I study my wife. You know, she's my best friend, she's my my my rock, she's my everything. But I still study her every day, and I'm like, what makes her tick? What makes her happy?
And I s I try to stop doing the things that aggravates her, but that doesn't work. but I know that her like her thing is she likes to go and do things, she likes to spend time together. So and that's her love language. And I think a lot of guys we're trying to make our wives happy in ways that don't make them happy or can't make them happy because that's not their love language. So, guys, if you if you ever want a great book on marriage.
Pick out the pick up the book called The L the Five Love Languages.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (28:33)
And there's actually a few of them. There's also one for five love languages for children. So they're great ones to to get to understand the language that your loved ones are speaking. Because sometimes and I'm sure Richard you've noticed it, well he actually just said, Sometimes you're speaking French, but she's speaking Italian and it just doesn't quite quite connect. So
Richard (29:01)
Like there
was one there was a time when I f when we first got together, I bought her flowers every week just because it was a Tuesday. I would buy her flowers. After fifteen years, one day she just looked at me, she says, I appreciate you, you know, I appreciate the gifts that you give me every week, but I really don't like flowers. I'd I'd rather you buy I'd r
I I would rather get plants or you know, something for around the house. That's what I would prefer. She's like, I love the thought that you care that much. She's like, but that's not then I realized, okay, that wasn't her love language. So that's when that's when I really started studying, okay, what makes her happy? Like now instead of buying her gifts, I'll plan a trip. Or we'll go somewhere, we'll go to Atlantic City, we'll go, we'll go to Vegas, we'll go do s you know, go away for a weekend somewhere.
'Cause that's her love language. That's what sh that's what fills her cup. And sometimes you want to make sure you fill her cup with the right things.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (30:10)
No point putting things in the cup that she isn't gonna drink.
Richard (30:13)
Exactly. And but you know, you learn with experience. You have but you have to be empathetic and you have to actually listen to what they're saying.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (30:25)
And that's not just how how they speak what their love language is, it's the experiences that they've gone through actually get to know that person, not just surface level, but actually go go deeper.
Richard (30:41)
Yeah. You know, like one of my mentors, Mr. John Lee Doom has said, if you want to be successful in anything, you have to go an inch wide, but you gotta go a mile deep. And that includes your relationship with the with your husband or your wife, 'cause g l ladies, if you're listening to this, your husband have love languages too, and it might not be what you think it is. So maybe pick up that book.
Just saying.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (31:08)
And speaking of books, you've got a couple as well and some great stories in them. So do you want to share a little bit more about your story and those books that you have written? And maybe tell
Richard (31:22)
All right, I've written two books.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (31:24)
people where they can get hold of you if they want to.
Richard (31:27)
Okay, I I've written two I've written two books. One is called A Hero's Journey from Darkness to Light. It's my story, talking about what not to do. and at the end of each chapter, it it gives a little bit of advice of what to do. the last two chapters are what does addiction look like? It's not what you think it looks like, and what does depression look like? It's not what you think it looks like.
and that that book is on Amazon. It's actually on Kindle too. It's free on on Amazon and Audible. So and and I think the book is ninety nine cents and
The audio book and the e book is ever one hundred percent of the proceeds go to help end veteran suicide. So I don't make any money. All the money goes back to to help end veteran suicide. the second book is Yep.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (32:28)
That is a very worthwhile cause 'cause
far too many of our veterans struggle
Richard (32:34)
Yeah, we're losing we're we're losing
fifty to fifty five veterans and first responders a day to suicide.
So all all them yeah.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (32:44)
We need to help them.
Richard (32:46)
So all that money goes to help them. I don't make any any money off of it. My second book is about starting a podcast. How to start a podcast, how to mastering power, purpose, and profit. Because the average podcast lasts 13 episodes. and you're the reason why they don't last is one of them the is they're not powerful.
If they're not powerful, people are not gonna listen. Number two is if if it's not purposeful. If there's no purpose, if you're just starting a podcast to make money or because everybody has one, you're not gonna last. And third of all, if your profit your p podcast is not making a profit, eventually your spouse is gonna look at you and be like, We're paying all this money for Opus Clip, we're paying all this money for StreamYard or
Or whatever you're whatever you're using to podcast with, eventually the money's gonna start running out. So if you're not making a profit, if you don't have sponsors, if you don't have affiliate marketing, you're gonna you're gonna just decide, you know what? It's not worth it. Because podcasting is the job. I don't care which way you look at it, it's work. Even if you love it, it's still work. So that's what my my s my second book is all about, how to start a podcast.
How to become profitable before you even release your first episode.
It's forty-three pages. It's on it's on Amazon. It's forty-three pages and the ebook it's all clickable. So if you bought the ebook at breakfast, by dinner you can have a podcast release.
So and I
Sarah Jordan-Ross (34:35)
Podcasting
is lots of fun, but yeah, it is work. So any little bits of help and advice you can get along the way. So from this podcaster, go get the book. It just might make life easier.
Richard (34:49)
Yeah, and and you know, like I mean I'm I'm and I tell everybody, I just did a post about this about ten minutes before I got on. I'm a ninth grade dropout. I don't have a high school diploma, I don't have a college degree, but if I can get a podcast to be in the top one percent, a top one on entrepreneur podcast this week and four million downloads, anybody can do it. It's not rocket scientists.
You just have to have a plan and I teach you the plan.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (35:24)
A story to shed.
Richard (35:27)
Yep, because everybody's got a story. And you never know who your story can affect. Like you might be able to affect people when you come 'cause I'm I'm I want to have you come on my show. You may affect people
Sarah Jordan-Ross (35:38)
I'd love to.
Richard (35:39)
that I can't touch. And I may be able to touch people that you can't touch. So everybody has a story to tell. And everybody, like I said, is struggling with something. So why not put it out there that hey, I'm not okay, you're not okay.
Let's be okay not okay together.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (35:59)
maybe being not okay together. Eventually we'll get to the be okay together.
And on that note, what gives you hope?
Richard (36:17)
Well, anytime I I look at my daughter's face and my son's and I got two I got three kids. Anytime I look at my kids, I see there's a bigger world out there than just the world that that I'm l living in in this little box and and my phone. There's a bigger world out there than and I think there's some great things are going on in the world. I know a lot of people are like
my God, AI is gonna take over the world, they're gonna kill us all. but I I believe that things are just gonna keep getting better and better and better. And I think if you're a person of faith, you know what the end result is. You know you're gonna win. So how can how can you not have hope when you know in the end you're going to win guaranteed?
Sarah Jordan-Ross (37:16)
And there's far more things to be hopeful about than there is to despair about. So we need to remember that.
Richard (37:22)
And most of the most of the
and most of the things people worry about, things that never happen to them were are never going to happen to them.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (37:31)
Yeah. Sometimes it's the if you look at what's really bothering you in six months, is it still going to be bothering you? Then why are you letting it destroy you things?
Richard (37:44)
Yeah. And that that goes with people too. You know, there's eight billion people in this world, something something crazy. Don't let one person destroy your day. Move on move on.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (38:05)
Before we we wrap up, is there anything in particular you'd like to leave our listeners with today?
Richard (38:13)
Well, like we we talked about earlier.
The three most important language the words in the English language are today, I decide. Today decided we decide if we're gonna be victims or victors. And the way I end my show on my podcast is every morning we wake up, we have a choice. You can either be a victim or you can be a victor. You could be a victim of your past or a victor of your present and your future. It's all up to you. It's all up to the listener. Depends on what kind of day you want to have.
If you wanna have a good day, you're gonna have a good day. If you wanna have a bad day, you're gonna have a bad day. So it's all up to you. Today I decide.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (39:01)
Today I decide. And that's a perfect note for us to finish up on. Richard, thank you so much for joining me today. I think that's one of the things that will definitely stick with me from this conversation is the I get to decide and my story isn't done yet. And I get to decide what the rest of it is.
Richard (39:24)
Yep. And big shout out to Jeff. I love you. Thank you so much. I appreciate you.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (39:33)
Yeah. Yes. That's my husband Jeff that Richard's doing that shout out for.
Richard (39:40)
Yep. Jeff and Jim, I love you, Jim.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (39:44)
Yes. And that's Jim Bagoon who he also has a podcast that's well worth listening to.
Richard (39:51)
Yes.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (39:53)
So I'll put those those details for all of those amazing men that I get to call friends in that podcast in the show notes so that you can all go listen to them as well as listening to me.
And remembering that you get to decide. And when we're looking at somebody else's story, we might see the comeback, we might see the get back up, but we don't necessarily know
what it's taken for that person to get there. We might see somebody who's helping and encouraging others without realizing how much they're carrying themselves. Perhaps that's why it's important to keep having those conversations. Because we don't know what anybody else has lived through unless we talk about it.
And everybody has a story to share and we can all learn so many things from each other. We just have to be willing to listen.
So if anything in today's conversation has resonated with you, challenged you, made you curious, send me a message. Reach out, I love to hear from you.
And I'd love to know other conversations that you'd like me to have on Taboo Talk. There's a there's an advantage to my podcast being called what it is. I get to talk about whatever I want and share whoever's story I want. So tell me what you're thinking, what you're wrestling with, what we should be talking about. Cause these conversations aren't meant to stop when we hit the stop button on the recording.
We need to keep talking, we need to keep helping each other, we need to keep sharing each other's stories.
We need to keep deciding what our future is going to be. Until next time, take care of yourselves, take care of each other, and remember, your story matters. So share it. And Richard, thank you so much for coming on and sharing just a little bit of your story, because I know there's so much more to it.
Richard (42:29)
Thank you for having me.
Sarah Jordan-Ross (42:33)
Until next time, I'm Sarah Jordan Ross and this has been Taboo Talk.